Friday, April 9, 2010

Dear Blog


Dear Blog,
I have missed you. I feel less witty and likable without you. I would like to invite you back in to my life. Once I complete the 85 loads of laundry, and vacuum my floors I hope to invite you back in to my world.

I would like to tell you about:
  1. My sweet Leslie, so you can think about her and offer her your love and support.
  2. The B-eautiful Elmo picture Ginger's mom painted to commemorate Avery's First Birthday.
  3. Avery's upcoming Tube "surgery". Surgery sounds so serious, but I have been assured it is not. I am still very afraid. It is on the 15th.
  4. My disdain for Tiki Barber. BTW, Tiger says thanks Tiki. At least his wife wasn't pregnant with twins, and he can "blame" his illness. Between you and Jesse James, Tiger Woods is a regular Casanova. I saw Tiki on Sesame Street. He was learning about the word quest. He was on a quest to learn about quest. It was so clever. Greg said Tiki must have been on a quest for something else. Something staring with the letter "P" perhaps. Grover, can you please explain this to Tiki in terms he might understand.
  5. Jesse James, really? You are sleeping beside of Sandra Bullock every night, and you take comfort in the arms of a tatted up HO! Don't get me wrong, I never thought the guy with the "get paid" tatoo in the palm of his hand was a boy scout, but you cheated on the girl next door. Way to go IDIOT. New rule, if your wife is adored by millions, sick with cancer, or pregant, try to keep "little willie" in your pants. We are sick of you cheaters!
I shant over do it. Baby steps!

4 comments:

  1. Welcome back!!! Good post!

    Before your facebook post, I had no idea about Tiki Barber. Man, that really disappoints me! And Jesse James. Grrrr. What an idiot.

    The word "shant" makes me think of The Parent Trap (the original, not the one with that trashy milk-a-whaaa?) - when Sharon was trying to teach Susan to talk like she was from Boston. Love it.

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  2. i just watched that again the other day. i love HM! what a classic!!

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  3. About flippin time...missed you!

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