Warm and Toasty

I hope you are warm and toasty. I am loving being snowed in!

How I've Missed Thee Blog

Things I have considered blogging about while I have been away (an abbreviated look in to each topic):

1. Pharmaceutical Commercials - Do you get sick of these? Shouldn't your doctor be recommending drugs not your commercial break? Does every drug cause diarreah, excessive erections, and death? Seems that way to me.
2. Haiti - How can some idiot think that this is God's revenge on the only country every founded by slaves. I agree that we should "take care of our own", but to have hate in your heart for a country rocked by such horrible loss makes you insane, insensitive, inconsiderate, and just plain off your rocker.
3. Inconsiderate People - There is a couple at my daycare that really thinks they are just plain precious. They are both adorable. They remind me of plastic people. I cannot tell you how inconsiderate they are. I come to pick up Avery and they are standing in front of the door, at the reception desk, you name it. They act like they are the only people in the universe. They are your typical rich villains. Here's the thing, everyone wants to pick their kid up, not just you. So move your rich, snobby, white rumps out of the front of the freakin' door already. Gesh!
4. Gymboree - So Gymboree sucks me in with coupons, cute clothes, and Gym Bucks. Gym Bucks are a "future" discount on a predefined time frame. I had $25 in Gym Bucks. I drove Avery all the way to Winston on a Saturday and I couldn't find $50 worth of things to buy to use my $25 in Gym Bucks. It sucked. Plus, Gymboree is full of the aformentioned White, Entitled, Snobs. Gymboree, you are dead to me!
5. Target - What's up Target. You advertise this incredible deal on the Wii Fit which I have promised my dad for his birthday and then you don't have it, and I can't get a rain check? Not nice Target. Not nice. Watch you don't make the "Dead to Me List". Jimmy John's and Gymboree are getting mighty lonely.
6. Something The President said - Equal pay for equal work. What a theory. I hope this is a ball he can run with! I would like to be able to afford a stay at home husband.
   
7. The movie Valentine's Day - What a cast! I want to see it. I won't, but I want to.
8. Vomit - I am pretty sure Greg and I had the Noro Virus. It sucked. We puked. We puked a lot. It hurt. Chewed food should not come out your nose. EVER!
9. Time - There is never enough and it moves too fast. Avery is almost 1. What the what?
10. Excitement - Ginger and Christopher bought a new house, and I haven't even had a chance to chat with Ginger about it. I am so tickled for them, but I am sure she has no idea. I have been so swamped that I have not communicated this emotion at all.
11. Hand Me Downs - I went through the Avery had me down boxes and my little guy is rocking a whole new wardrobe. I love me some hand-me-downs.
12. Babies'r us - I need a coupon. If anyone sees one before Valentine's Day please share. I am hoping for a 20% off one!
    
13. Moe's - I love Moe's. Moe's is my most favorite burrito joint. Welcome to Moe's indeed! I will eat Q'Doba or Chipolte, but I love Moe's!
14. Haircut - My haircut is so overdue and I want to try and look more presentable. I must schedule a haircut soon.
15. Lindsey - Lindsey Y. is one of the funniest, most unique people, I have ever met in my life. On a daily basis Lindsey makes one of two things happen: snot comes out of my nose accidentally because I am laughing so hard, or I pee my pants a little because I see her before I make it to the bathroom and she says something hysterical.
16. Bathroom Etiquette - There is a lady at my work who doesn't wash her hands after she uses the bathroom. This amazes me. Yuck freak! Yuck! While we are on this subject, if you need to blow up the bathroom in the middle of the day, please go to another floor. That's what I do!
17. I've missed you blog. Life really is full of things to blog about.
    

Weirdness and More Weirdness

Do you ever stand around and just listen to other people's conversations and think, "really?" It happens to me all of the time.

Lindsey and I walked up to Quizno's to grab a bit-o-nourishment today. Before I dive in, let me give you a couple of random updates. First, it was cold. Like Well Digger's Butt cold. I personally have never touched a Well Digger's Butt, but according to my dad's catch phrase dictionary, they are pretty freakin' cold. Lindsey popped her collar up Elvis style and instead of looking ridiculous, she looked uber cute. I, quite to the contrary, just looked cold. I considered turning back COLD, but I didn't want to seem like a quitter and Lindsey was keeping me entertained as she is SUPER funny. Anyhow, I thought I might die, but we made it. On the walk back Lindsey talked about how she needed a hat. I quietly thought, yeah, a hat would be nice. I have a hat, but it is at home on my kitchen table. I swear to you, my bones were hurting. I sit down at my desk and realize that my coat has a hood. WHAT THE WHAT? Really? I just about froze my ears off and the whole time there was a hood piled up on my back. Gesh, I really do get dumber every day.

Any who, back to the point. While Lindsey was getting our Free drinks (thanks the to Coupons4Winston website), I was paying. When I walked over to where Lindsey was I noticed she was being really still. You know the still, like I see a snake or a bear or maybe a roach, but I don't want to acknowledge it, still. Of course, I start talking to her and she gives me the shut the freak up gritted teeth stare. It is then that I tune in to the conversation going on behind us. This guy is talking about finding Jesus in a meteor storm in the dark on a concrete basketball court. Now look, I have no problem with finding Jesus, but this guy was telling a story that made me feel like any old second he was going to offer me a cup of Kool-Aid, and I was not interested at all. Lindsey, on the other hand, was transfixed which got me totally tickled. Had I lost it and started giggling, I am pretty sure this dude would have pulled a snake out of his pocket and tried to heal me. You really had to be there, but dang it was funny, and for once it was awesome to have a witness along. Generally this strange crap only happens when I have not a witness one.

On a related, but different note, I have really started noticing signs more and more. All through Christmas the Aunt Beas in Pilot had this sign up:

Merry
Christmas Ham Plate
$4.99

I can't even count the number of times that Greg and I said "Merry Christmas Ham Plate" during the holidays. I hope it was also Happy for Ham Plate and his/her family. It also said Merry Christmas Chicken Biscuit for a hot minute. It didn't have the same ring!

That's two rounds of weirdness, but I have one more. Today at lunch my boss' boss was walking around asking if anyone had a can opener. Good old Super Dave knew where one was. The next thing I see is Peter (boss' boss) on his way to the kitchen, open can in hand. The suspense was killing me, so I say, "whatcha eatin?" To which he replies, "green beans". Really, you are eating a can of Lowe's Foods brand green beans for lunch? Is it just me or is that totally random. This man stands out in the freezing cold to smoke, and this is his lunch? Wow!

Happy New Year to You!

For the gifts brought in 2009 I am thankful, for the losses I am wrought with sadness, for the memories, opportunities, and lessons learned I am indebted.

I wish for you the same wish I write in every birthday card: May 2010 be immeasurably greater than 2009, but not nearly as great as 2011. Celebrate what you have, strive for what you want, and really question if the stuff in the middle is really all that important.

Happy New Year!!

Greg and Avery New Year's Eve 2009

Teaser

It sounds cheesy, but this really was the best Christmas ever. I don't have time to give the details, but I promise I will. So many presents, so many moments, so many memories. We really have been missing out, but I am so glad we waited. How lucky are we to have just had all of the firsts when so many people our age are done or have been done for years.

Just a few shots to keep you coming back for more!

My Sweet Boys

I love this SMILE

Did you say his belly shook when he laughed like a bowl full of jelly?

Does this shirt make me look fat? Is it velvet?

Yes, I Have Lost My Mind

So, I really started to feel bad that Avery didn't have a picture with Santa.... I started to get comments like, "What, you haven't? You have to take him to see Santa on his first Christmas!" It wasn't that I didn't want to, but working in Winston and living in Pilot Mountain, and having a husband in grad school at Wake Forest makes everything just slightly more complicated. Just slightly!

In an attempt to quiet the tightening feeling in my chest I planned to be at the mall at 10:00 a.m. Well, that would not be good enough. Not by a long shot. I stood in the line until about 11:40 when the not nice "elf" came around to tell us that if you weren't inside the gate at 12:15, it would be shut, and you would have to wait until Santa came back at 2:00. The girl behind me literally began weeping. There were 17 people in front of us and very little chance that we would make it in to the red gate.

12:15 came and I was three people behind the gate. Gate shut. Suck it kid, you ain't seein' Santa unless your mommy stands in the line for another hour and 45 minutes. I should mention that the very second I saw the size of the line I was ready to surrender, but Skylar felt it essential that he tell Santa what he wanted. I am a sucker for that kid. What choice did I have? I hunkered down, sent Mom and the boys to the food court and prepared myself for a long winters wait. I noticed that the line inside the red gate was moving with a quickness. I started to get very nervous. If they had time to get more people on the big guy's knee they would, problem was my bunch was MIA and my mom left her cell phone in the car.

A few minutes later comes the Christmas miracle. The "meanest" elf lady says to those of us in the front of the line that she is going to send some of us through. She asks the first three couples how many kids they had, and then she asked me. Before I could say a word, the weeper behind me says "ONE". Ummm, sweetheart you are precious, and I feel your pain, but I ain't about to let you pass me. Not on your life sweet cheeks. I hold up two fingers and she announces that the next 5 families can come through. Halle-freakin-lujah! As if on queue, Mom rounds the corner with three kids meals from Chick-fil-a! Suh-weet!

Needless to say, the rest was a mad dash. The pictures were ridiculously over priced, it was rushed, but it was over and I didn't have to worry about Avery someday thinking I was a piece of crap mother for not taking him to see Santa on his first Christmas.

Next year I will take a day off of work before Christmas Eve or I will participate in some activity that involves a Santa Visit. We are totally doing the the Gingerbread House session at the Children's Museum, hopefully breakfast with Santa at the Graleyn, and Leslie told me while I was in the Santa line that she went to some cool thing downtown with a Santa and you could take as many pictures as you wanted. What the what???

Water under the bridge. If I hadn't gone, I would have always regretted it, and imagined it much more glamorous than it was. Below are the fruits of my labor. They were too stinkin' expensive to get one of each of them and a combined shot. Ahhh, next year!

New Car

As you probably know, I love to take photographs. I really wish I could do it for a living, but I am not that good, and I hate getting paid by people that I care about. Over the years I have received some very creative "payments", but the best one to date is an almost new car. Can you imagine? It was so awesome. It has the quietest ride. You barely even hear it moving. I had an older one that sounded a bit like a covered wagon, but not this beauty and he handles like he's on rails (I have no idea what that means, but Julia Roberts says it in pretty woman, and I have been waiting on the opportunity to use it for years!). A low mileage car with less than a year on the title. I am in heaven!

I did Christmas pictures for the Wooten's and as payment, they gave me this car. As you can imagine, Avery couldn't be happier. This baby has logged many a mile up and down our driveway, in to our woods, and around our kitchen.

We call him BIG Blue. To Avery and to us, he is GLORIOUS!